We spent the evening nostalgically looking at photographs and videos from the last seven years. Comparing Hugo to Henry and vice versa. It’s hard to imagine that the baby Henry in those videos is actually my seven-year-old giant today. He has changed and developed beyond comparison, and although it is evident, he is the same child it doesn’t seem possible at the same time. As we went through the years, I tried to put my finger on that moment that he grew up. It came about so fast I must not have been looking when it happened. It’s so bittersweet re-watching those memories. On the one hand, it’s like reliving the moment, but on the other, it’s like mourning something that has passed. It’s subtle things like seeing our dog Roly often in the background slowly ageing. Time just seems to whizz by so fast and although when I look at those memories, I know that we had and shared some incredible moments I also see the amount of time which has passed without me realising.
It’s the simple things and the little moments that I take for granted each day. Like when Henry bustles in from school and sits down to read. When he tells me in a flurry of excitement all about his day. Or when he shares with me his goals and ambitions for his future. I know that it won’t be long before he doesn’t do that. He will spend more time up in his room and getting him to share details of his day will be difficult. With each year he grows and gains more independence and although I love seeing the wonderful person he is becoming I am also missing my boy.
I can’t stop time nor would I want to but it would be nice to be able to pause for a moment. Instead I have to admit the inevitable that my boys will grow, they won’t stay little forever, and in turn, they will have their own babies to nurture and teach. All I can do is cherish those simple moments. Stop and indulge Henry about his day, take a few more minutes for cuddles before bed and know that above all else we made memories and even if they passed quickly they will be with us forever.
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